Stimulans?
Har jag tappat greppet kring detta fenomen? Det har pågått nu alldeles för länge att jag inte får den stimulans som jag vanligtvis erhåller allt från vardagliga rutinsysslor till extravaganta utgångar och kompis get togethers.
Näe, det här går inte, måste tjattra på engelska.
Right, so I stumbled across several thoughts concering stimulans, what it really means, or rather, what it truly means to me as an individual. I mean of course, look it up in the dictionary and you have a pretty good description, but words cannot capture feelings to their fullest, and it's like I have taken over the role of the dictionary, or at least the handicap of not being able to capture that specific feeling. Or maybe stimulans is a whole world of different feelings, broken down and put together into new puzzle pieces building up this whole phenomena.
I mean, take as an example last night. Right, so I went with around 15 friends to a club that I've only had the pleasure to dance in once before, so I was looking forward to seeing if it was just as good as that one last time. Yeah, I do have like 1, maybe 2 places where I can go at least twice a month without getting sick of the atmosphere, the beer/wine, people, etc. Therefore, a club I've only been to once before is a catch, and a sure key to a fun night. I mean, what could possibly go wrong? I was there with a bunch of friends, they play electro/pop music, cheap wine, okay large crowd, two dance floors, nice people that work there, etc etc. I even made new friends there and on my way home. Yet, I didn't get that feeling I so easily got just a few months ago when going out. I tried dancing, but after a few songs even that seemed old and monotone, even if my movements weren't, and I had several different dance partners. This blows. That's happening more and more and more.
I don't even watch TV anymore, a few shows I download get to race across my eyes a few times a week. Movies, likewise. I used to be obsessed with movies! Like, a new one every other night. Now I can't even sit down long enough to enjoy it. Food is boring, unless it's really hott, or really spicy.
I have been painting though, and I will start sculpting in a little bit. That's all that's fun, now. Driving is fun, but my dad always gets home when it's pitch dark and all the other cars are out, so there's no point.
With art, it can always be created in different ways. No two paintings or sculptures look like the other, that's why I like it, and can sit down and enjoy it. Everything else...ugh. I like being in the presence of people, but don't get stimulated by conversation. That's why I like my dog, he doesn't talk, and I don't have to talk to him.
WHAT THE HELL!? This is not me!! It's like a part of me just went to sleep!
Looking forward to practical philosophy for spring term, maybe then I will understand the meaning of the ever so vague word stimulans.
This is how I feel, always (lately):
I want to feel like this again:
Näe, det här går inte, måste tjattra på engelska.
Right, so I stumbled across several thoughts concering stimulans, what it really means, or rather, what it truly means to me as an individual. I mean of course, look it up in the dictionary and you have a pretty good description, but words cannot capture feelings to their fullest, and it's like I have taken over the role of the dictionary, or at least the handicap of not being able to capture that specific feeling. Or maybe stimulans is a whole world of different feelings, broken down and put together into new puzzle pieces building up this whole phenomena.
I mean, take as an example last night. Right, so I went with around 15 friends to a club that I've only had the pleasure to dance in once before, so I was looking forward to seeing if it was just as good as that one last time. Yeah, I do have like 1, maybe 2 places where I can go at least twice a month without getting sick of the atmosphere, the beer/wine, people, etc. Therefore, a club I've only been to once before is a catch, and a sure key to a fun night. I mean, what could possibly go wrong? I was there with a bunch of friends, they play electro/pop music, cheap wine, okay large crowd, two dance floors, nice people that work there, etc etc. I even made new friends there and on my way home. Yet, I didn't get that feeling I so easily got just a few months ago when going out. I tried dancing, but after a few songs even that seemed old and monotone, even if my movements weren't, and I had several different dance partners. This blows. That's happening more and more and more.
I don't even watch TV anymore, a few shows I download get to race across my eyes a few times a week. Movies, likewise. I used to be obsessed with movies! Like, a new one every other night. Now I can't even sit down long enough to enjoy it. Food is boring, unless it's really hott, or really spicy.
I have been painting though, and I will start sculpting in a little bit. That's all that's fun, now. Driving is fun, but my dad always gets home when it's pitch dark and all the other cars are out, so there's no point.
With art, it can always be created in different ways. No two paintings or sculptures look like the other, that's why I like it, and can sit down and enjoy it. Everything else...ugh. I like being in the presence of people, but don't get stimulated by conversation. That's why I like my dog, he doesn't talk, and I don't have to talk to him.
WHAT THE HELL!? This is not me!! It's like a part of me just went to sleep!
Looking forward to practical philosophy for spring term, maybe then I will understand the meaning of the ever so vague word stimulans.
This is how I feel, always (lately):
I want to feel like this again:
Kommentarer
Postat av: Lova
I do know the feeling...
Livet är verkligen segt nu, men jag tror att vi kan skylla på november och mörkret, åtminsone delvis! Och vi får faktiskt göra det, vi är svenskar!
//Lova
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